Tuesday, August 19, 2014

The shock of twins

As a woman there will most likely come a time in your life when you will take the dreaded stick challenge. The reality is that whether it comes up pregnant or not pregnant no words can describe what you feel during those two minutes of waiting and learning the response (even less words are able to describe the feeling once you've learned the response).

A year ago I took the stick challenge and I was pregnant. After I mustered up the strength to tell my boyfriend the results we had to face the first doctor's visit.

You would think that finding out you're pregnant can cause anxiety; what you don't know is that when you schedule your doctor's appointment you have to wait until six weeks after your last cycle. For me this meant I had to wait two weeks from the day I called to make an appointment. Those were the most stressful two weeks of my life. Never having spoken of pregnancy with anyone I had known to be pregnant and being superstitious (yes I believe it's bad luck to announce a pregnancy before the end of the 1st trimester) I felt like I was blindly entering a storm, waiting for the longest 14 days of my life to pass.

After about a week of waiting I felt as though I was already starting to show (I had a little bump forming in the bottom of my belly and my jeans were fitting tightly). Luckily I worked with kids and had the ability to wear sweats/yoga pants to work. I asked my boyfriend if I was crazy or could he see the bump. He noticed it as well (which set my mind at ease) and joked that maybe there were two babies.

Finally, the day of my appointment had arrived and we headed to the doctor's office on a beautiful August morning. He waited patiently in the waiting room as I underwent an annual visit. Once that was complete the doctor turned on a sonogram machine. As it warmed up cold jelly was placed on my belly and I was anxious to see the first picture of my baby.

The machine was ready!

The sonogram began and the doctor said to me, "that black spot is the sack and that little gray spot is the baby". All I could think of was a high school biology experiment where my teacher had us incubate chicken eggs and then crack them in petri dishes during different stages of development (a class I barely passed because I refused to complete the lab). I looked at the monitor and realized something. THERE WERE TWO BLACK SPOTS! The doctor calmly stated so you have two babies in there.

Every emotion I had felt before that moment was out the window, shock had taken over and all I could do was laugh. First thought, now I have to pick out two good names! Second thought, Oh S***! I have to tell him there's two. [I have to say through out my pregnancy it was as if my doctor knew what I was thinking and would lead the conversation in a way that would answer my question before I even asked it.] The doctor asked me if dad was in the picture, my response (still laughing) yes... can you tell him there are two because I don't know what to say. The doctor went out to the waiting room, brought him into the room and explained to him the way she had to me. Needless to say he also began laughing uncontrollably.

There they were; two babies growing inside of me and I was ready  for the job of keeping them safe and healthy. 

Sunday, May 25, 2014

Life Changes

Since my last post a lot has changed in my life.

I sit on my couch and realize I have accomplished my main goals in life. I found  a job I'm amazing at and I haven't allowed it to consume me, fallen in love with a man who loves me in sweatpants and no makeup, and I've changed the world by having two wonderful children! 

Many have probably never thought of having children as a huge accomplisment, but as I sat one day watching my newborns sleep I came to the realization that they are the future. Thus, if they are the future of this world I just changed the future by having them. It is truly a wonderful feeling to know that you have a greater hand in the future than just what you achieve during your lifetime. 

Now I don't mean to believe that one of my children will be the next president of the United States (although we all hope), but that I will raise them to feed the homeless, believe in faith (hoping they believe in God as well), and putting 110% of themselves in everything they do. 

I can't wait to see how they grow.